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In a strange twist of fate I found myself standing on the corner of Dustman Road and North Main Street yesterday.
OK, not so strange; Dave sent me. It is my job, after all. The Indiana Cops cyclists were to arrive any moment and I had to wait at the corner to shoot their picture.
But the point is, I was stuck on the corner, in my dress shirt, my pockets stuffed with cameras, lens caps, notebooks, pens and assorted bits of paper; looking like one of those guys with the sign that says, “Will work for food” only I was working.
Oddly enough everyone was looking at me as if I wasn’t.
The drivers of the first few cars simply rolled up their windows and pretended not to notice me. A polite way of ignoring someone.
The next few drivers must have been too hot to roll up their windows, so they simply turned up their radios.
Meanwhile I was doing everything I could to look natural. But how natural can you look standing on a street corner in Bluffton? It’s not as if I could pretend I was waiting to cross the road. Where would I have been going?
The first minutes I occupied myself with checking camera angles; seeing how I could shoot video and still pictures at the same time.
Unfortunately I was standing there longer than a few minutes.
Fifteen minutes went by and the sweat was pouring off me like I was running a marathon through the desert.
I sought some shelter under a nearby tree, but that served only to make me look more suspicious, apparently, as the next few drivers not only rolled up their windows, but also turned up their radios.
That was a decidedly bad sign so I stepped back into the blazing sun to wait.
I looked east down Dustman Road hoping I might spy the cyclists, got too close to the road and earned a blaring horn blast.
Then came the offers of canned goods. At least, I like to think of them as offers.
One car rolled past real slow.
“Do you need something to eat?” asked one driver.
“No, thanks. I’m a reporter on duty.”
With that said, they threw a can of creamed corn at me and sped away.
I stood on that corner about 40 minutes. During that time I gathered two more cans of corn, a can of Spam, two cans of spinach, a canned ham and 11 cans of pumpkin mix.
By the time I made it back to the office I had a half dozen pictures and a bag of groceries.
All in all, I’d call that a pretty good day’s work. It’s just too bad nobody threw me a can opener.
jerryb@news-banner.com
by JERRY BATTISTE
www.twitter.com/jerrybattiste
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